Being Immune Compromised During A Pandemic

Its been about a year since Covid-19 rolled onto the scene and I still can't wrap my head around the array of reactions. I assumed an infectious disease would instill caution. For a while, people were cautious, but that seemed to fade after months of feeling inconvenienced. As more time passed, it became evident that people don't often consider (or care) how their actions impact others. 

I'VE TRAINED FOR THIS
I've been living the immune compromised life since 2013. For the past 8 years I've attuned my ears to the sound of the slightest cough or sneeze in a room. Fact is, any and all viruses have the potential to become a deadly threat to my life. Because of this fact, I regard every illness with respect, and Covid19 I must take seriously. If I contract it, I'm high risk for developing severe complications and becoming very sick. This is because I have to take Humira, which is a medication to lowers my body's ability to fight infections.

So what's being immune compromised during a global pandemic like? In some ways I already felt prepared. Stay home when you're sick - already do that. Wear a mask on an airplane - yep. Wipe down groceries after the cashier touches everyone's filthy cash and items - been doing that for years. I honestly think people with normal immune systems got a dose of what its like to live in a reality where catching a disease might wreck them.

BECOMING A RECLUSE
Living in wisdom for me during this time has meant avoiding social gatherings. It has meant being strict about only seeing friends and family outdoors. Its meant breaking traditions and missing people I love. Its meant becoming a bit of a hermit for a span of time. 

SHARED AIR

Working in a restaurant these days is a dicey environment for an immunocompromised person. Simply because customers are eating and drinking without a mask on. They're talking, chewing, clearing their throat- all things that release respiratory droplets. Aerosol transmission means microscopic bits of fluid linger in the air. Have you ever seen someone sneeze in a room where sunlight is shining? Holy airborne particles!! Contaminates can be inhaled even if people are distanced 6 feet apart. That's why ventilation is super important. For the majority of the summer I worked on the patio, but once winter hit, all dining was indoors.

P.S. Wearing a mask and waiting tables when its 95 degrees Fahrenheit out= So.Much.Sweat. So much "maskne". I also tended to get a sore throat from announcing the specials loudly for customers to hear through my mask. Basically shouting for 6 hours straight. 

FACE SURGERY EXAMPLE
I've always had a short fuse for people not being considerate enough to stay home when sick. Here's a prime example of why it upsets me: During summer 2019 I was surrounded by co-workers that had a common cold. I knew I was destined to eventually end up with what they were bringing in. Sure enough I caught it and it turned into a horrible sinus infection. The infection got trapped in the walls of my head and couldn't drain. For nearly half a year my energy was zapped and I had pressure headaches. When I laid down to sleep it felt like I was suffocating. The infection didn't respond to treatments and eventually I had to have sinus surgery.

Traumatized, all because people were
too selfish to stay home when sick

That's about as fair as it gets in the immune compromised life...a cold that was just a weeklong annoyance for others required surgical intervention for me! By the way, recovering from sinus surgery is rough!!

PARANOIA AND CONSPIRACIES
This pandemic spiraled into a political mess with conspiracy theories up the wazoo! I've heard it said, "but this is how it starts. First they make you wear a mask. Next they are restricting where you can go and when. Before you know it, the governing authorities have become dictators that have control over everything!" 
Whoa, let's calm down. How do you for sure know what the future holds?

I have several friends that work in the hospital and they wish the public would walk in their shoes for a day. Then the community could see just how this virus impacts those suffering with it. Over 400,000 citizens in the US have died already, yet we are disillusioned. 

APATHETIC COMMENTS

For months I heard insensitive comments made by coworkers and friends. How "we all need to get over this virus thing and move on". Excuse me, but the immunocompromised don't have that luxury; we have to remain vigilant.  I tried not to take inadvertent jabs personally. To be honest though, it felt like people didn't care if their actions lead to my death. Folks often said, "the immune compromised need to stay home so the rest of us can get back to normal". This past year I learned how it feels when society pushes you out of the way and prioritizes their freedoms above your life.

I know people that refuse to shop at certain stores because they ask customers to wear a mask. If a business can require patrons to wear pants or shoes, they also can require a face mask. One person's choice to not wear a mask shouldn't trump another person's rights to not get sick. I didn't choose the immunocompromised life; the immunocompromised life chose me. 

In the Fall of 2020 the hospitals in my state became full (actually overcapacity) due to a local surge in cases. There was no guarantee of receiving care if hospitalization was necessary. Alas, that's when I quit my job and withdrew from public even more. Going to my job was the last sense of normalcy I had, and when I left I was depressed for quite a while. Yet I knew it was the prudent thing to do. All because at age 19 I got dealt a defective colon, which created a domino effect of health problems in my life.

ADMIRATION AND RESENTMENT
I've always admired citizens in Asian countries for wearing masks when they're sick. Its a common courtesy to protect others from germs. Ask Americans to do the same and it becomes an insult, as assault on their freedom. We throw a fit when asked to do something practical to help protect our neighbors. (Yes I'm aware that masks don't give total protection, but they sure cut back on larger respiratory droplets). We have tools to help shield us from disease, but are too stubborn to utilize them. That's the world for ya. Can't really have too high of expectations I guess. 

CHURCH HURTS
Of all the reactions I've been shocked by, the one that's dumbfounded me the most has been the response of the church. For many Christians, being asked to wear a mask has been interpreted as some form of persecution. I expected this from the world, but the church I hold to a higher standard. I'm baffled that those that ought to reflect God's love and care for the lowly seem to be more concerned with their privileges. I've been disappointed by my brothers and sisters. As an immunocompromised person, its left me bitter. 

WHAT WOULD JESUS DO
During this pandemic I've often thought about how Jesus would act. Would he be concerned about his earthly rights? Would he get upset when being asked to do something to look after the vulnerable? Answer: He would choose to love by his actions! 

AN ATTITUDE LIKE HIS
I can't help but reflect of the following passage, "Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death- even death on a cross!" (Philippians 2:4-8)

In March 2020 when churches (and everything else) was shut down for lockdown, it wasn't an attack on the church. Even IF it was persecution, the Scripture tells us to "rejoice in our sufferings, knowing it produces perseverance, character and hope" (Romans 5).

VACCINE HELP
Its been a year of hard circumstances, poor attitudes and over two million deaths worldwide from a nasty virus. The vaccine is getting rolled out. In my state healthcare workers get first opportunity, then the elderly, high risk groups, and essential workers. After that the general public will be offered it. I'm grateful there's finally some light at the end of this long, dark health crisis. But I'm also left with all these angry feelings from the way people have behaved.

I hope sharing my experience of what its been like for me has offered some perspective. I know better days are ahead, but until then we must have a little more patience and be willing to think of others. Our choices don't only affect ourselves. With rights also come responsibilities.